Strange Emergency

One of the scariest things in life is driving on the road alongside beginning Driver’s Ed students.  I’m not sure what’s more terrifying: the fact that there are puny, squeaky-voiced little children unsuccessfully attempting to maneuver their vehicles less than 24 inches away your own, or the fact that their senile driving instructors are usually more concerned with catching a couple more minutes of shut-eye than keeping their croc-clad feet on the emergency brake. What’s more, the babies driving these cars, more often than not, can’t seem to tell the difference between a stop sign and an interstate exit, let alone stay on their side of the road.

But even with all its many faults, Driver’s Ed is sill a necessary part of society. We obviously have to drill some sense of education into the minds (and steering wheels) of young drivers before they can be let loose onto the asphalt streets of society. With that said, I truly believe that the Driving Education program should aim to teach children everything they really need to know about driving on our roads, which is something they haven’t really been doing recently. The basics just aren’t sufficient enough for the issues associated with driving for today’s adolescence- they should be prepared for any situation that comes their way. Sure, it’s clearly important to know that green means go and that cars can only go one way on a One Way street. But basic driving knowledge is easy to master with practice, and won’t get you anywhere if you don’t have additional knowledge about other aspects of the road.

Driver’s Ed teachers have all (hopefully) driven in the real world. They know how absolutely senseless most of the other drivers on the road are, and have all encountered their share of road trauma. But do they teach their students what to do in times of strange emergency? No. So what’s going to happen when a young driver gets flipped the bird by a stranger with road rage? Or trapped in a car with a rabid raccoon? What will the poor drivers do when they find themselves stuck inside a Volkswagen beetle straddling the Grand Canyon? They’re not going to have the slightest clue about how to proceed, dammit! Nobody ever prepared them for a situation like this. If only there was a course or some class they could attend to better their driving education… Oh wait there is. Or at least, there’s supposed to be.

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